“Why I Didn’t Marry Rita Dominic” – Relationship Lesson From Jim Iyke’s Interview
This article was inspired by an interview Jim Iyke granted to Broadway TV where he said his relationship with Rita Dominic broke up because they were both not ready. He mentioned something I feel compelled to talk about.
SEE JIM IYKE INTERVIEW HERE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4tu4LfV8A_I
This principle is applicable in ALL areas of life but I will apply it to relationships and marriages.
Every relationship or marriage has its season. Even every individual have their season. I was privileged to listen to a Jim Iyke interview yesterday (the interview is unpublished yet) where he confessed to living a fast life during his time of boom and fame. He said all he knew then was to enjoy, have fun and go after anyone without thinking of the consequences.
That was a season in his life. Obviously, he is a better person now. Jim Iyke made this comment when the interviewer asked him why most of his Exes especially in the industry do not have good things to say about him. He even took responsibility while maintaining that it takes two to tangle.
Let’s believe that Jim Iyke is now an awesome man in his relationship and he’s having a swell time. He inspires and challenges you. Then, you make the awful mistake of comparing what he now has to what you have or what your spouse has – that is what I call the seed and harvest approach.
Don’t compare your seed season to someone else’s harvest moment.
Jim’s seed time was the times he made all those mistakes and did all those things without thinking. His harvest time is now where he acts and behaves in an emotionally matured way.
Your standing and falling now refer to your seed season. Your mistakes are your seed season as well.
In the same vein, your love life has its season. You must be able to recognize it. Stop comparing the seed-time of your relationship or marriage to the harvest time of someone else’s marriage.
Instead of comparison, ask questions and learn. Set out the type of relationship or marital harvest you want to have. Surround yourself with information and people who can help you have it. Don’t be sad and ask ‘why can’t my love life be like this?’ Remember, you are on a journey, you are sowing a seed and it takes time to germinate and grow for the world to see.
Does this mean you should put up with abusive relationships and people who aren’t willing to commit? That’s not it. You must be skilled at recognizing the potential in a person or relationship. Stop judging by what you see today alone, look at the values and personalities involved and identify the possibilities inherent within them even if not yet visible.
Look out for values such as honesty, integrity, and love. A man or woman who has these has potentials for so much more that they currently may not have. A relationship or marriage who has these can transform into so much more than they currently are.
There is something sweet about being the one who recognizes value before the value comes to play. Imagine being the one who recognizes the value in your spouse while everyone else doesn’t and ten years after he or she is standing on a world’s podium and goes “my partner is the reason I am here today. He/she saw this even before I did”.
Today, we love only when we are loved. We submit only when we are submitted to. We give only when we get. We put in some work only when the other person does the same.
I am an advocate of “both of us must work marriage for it to work” however, it may take one person to work it consistently strategically before the other person joins in. This is dependent on the potential you have sighted in this person and this relationship.
A young woman saw potential in a man and married him despite the fact that she despises his dressing sense and ‘traditional beliefs’ but today that same man who never believed in ‘cooking for a woman’, ‘washing a woman’s underwear’ and several others now gladly does them. That man is today a relationship counselor who even encourages other men to stop being rigid.
Some men are in a seed season when you meet them, if you don’t believe or can’t wait for their for their harvest, it’s okay to move on but always remember that the worst boyfriend to you can be the best husband to another – same goes for the woman.
The next time you want to ask why your love life is not as sweet as that of someone you know, remember that you are in your seed season and the other person is in his or her harvest season. Enjoy your season and don’t stop sowing the seed if you truly want the harvest.
Without this seed, harvest is not certain.
Do you disagree with this?
Mr. Legend is a relationship expert who is passionate about the subject of Happy and Long-Lasting marriage. He believes that only the High-Value Partner can build such marriage. Legend trains singles and married on how to become the High-Value Partner. He trains in the process of building a Happy and Long-Lasting Marriage as well. He is also the founder of happylovelife.ng | Follow him on IG: @OlatunjiLegend